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The Beginning of the End

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Saturday, February 11th, 2006
11:35 am
Wow i havent been on livejournal in like a year . . . i dont think that anyone really uses this thing anymore. Humm . . what has happened?


SOUTH SWEETHEARTS 06'
oh wow it was so fun !!!! Some stuff happened that i didnt exspect to happen feel kind of weird about it. BUt you know wahtever. i dance with chad, ralph. and Alec. It was really fun. That is really like the first time that i ahve had fun for a really long imte. I think a flame might have engnited with me and someone. I really dont think that nothing big is gunna happen because i dont wanna a boyfriend for a really long time. Relationship are jsut too much complacated stuff that you dont need in you life. I'm mean on the real I'm 15 and is the relationship that i ahve right now gunna impact my life that much outside of these four years of high school. No not really, so yea i plan on staying single for a long while, until i'm ready to get in a really long and commeted relationship. Oh yea about relationships, i messed up another one. Noaha nd i ended up going out and yea lets just say that didnt last long at all. I guess i messed up i dont know how i messed up but i did. I also was about to get ino a fight with palma. but that is totrally blown over and it was like people were fuling the flame. I thinking that i was jsut in a bad mood because of some personal stuff then she jsut like made a lil comment and everything blow up from there. We are cool now though. This year i am trying not to have beef with people. Like it one of my goals i know that some people already hate me for some stupid reasons that i really dont know about but you know that i dont really care. I got what four more months left at south and i'm outta there. but that doesnt mean that i want people to like hate me but i'm just not really worried about it. Yea . . . i really wanna fix something, like the one thing i wanna fix really bad is the whole murphy thing. i talked to Vinnie about it yesterday and it's sjut something that i need to do.

Today i am going to the South vs. Roosevelt basketball game. I wanna go see deenis coach i'm excited and Alec and Chad are coming so tha shoudl be fun/ I think that we are going to go to the mall after and get some food. But yea that shoudl be fun i love those tow boys. You knwo who i really love too is Kitters and Tristan theya re so tight but yea.

I found out on wednesday that i can play soccer. Never higher than high school probably cuz i'm gunna get knee replacment surgery but yea all i really care about at this time is the near future liek the summer season which i am okay to play in. i'm goign to my first practice next tuesday which you dont even understand how excited i am! Southeast is been having a horrible winter season cuz we are in C1 adn it is really ahrd for us. But hopfully this sumemr is guna be our year. wow i say that every year but i really hope it is.

2006 is getting a lil more interesting . . . .

current mood: anxious, so much going on

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Sunday, January 22nd, 2006
9:59 am - BLAH!
It's monday and what a monday it it's. I'm at school adn yea, it's school. I didn't do anythign this weekend but do that young homework. I was suppose to chill with some homies but it never happened. i messed up my leg pretty good shopping on Sauturday. Shopping was fun but i can't wear like naythign cuz my knee was so swollen. I litterally couldn't walk. i was really scared that i couldn't left up my leg. it really sucks cuz i basicaclly have to rebulid my whole muscle. Like i have none. It's like learning to walk again. i didn't think that it was going to to be that big of a deal but it really is. Umm yea but i have to go work. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow adn i think thaey might take my stiches out and i'm hella scared! God this sucks

current mood: nervous

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Sunday, January 15th, 2006
7:08 pm - 2005, 2006 the good the bad and the changes

This is really weird I was thinking about how i wish I still wrote in a journal and I came across this and I spent hours looing through my old entries. U use ti run to this as soon as i came home. I miss that.

It's 2006 baby!

2005 -  There were so many good thing and so many good things and many bad thing that happen that last year.

I was part of my first relationship. I had my first real boyfriend, Murphy and i look back on it and I realize that I didn't know how to handle it. I didn't realize what i had and how it wouldnt be there forever. I messed things up quite a bit, which is one of the things that I seemed to do a lot of. But over all i think that it was the best thing ever and i wouldnt take him back for the world, i loved him so much and i hope he knows that still. I jsut didnt knwo what i wanted at the time adn i played with him when i shoudl have jsut been honest but i guess your are going to be scared for your first time in anything.

Then along came graduation, I left marcy the one thing that I thought I would miss so much. I guess i really don't i'm glad that it is over. Marcy wasn't who i was but just a part of my life that is over now. I really have let go of marcy and i don't think that i will ever reattach myself, but i will always remember what it was and how it impacted me.

The sumemr was fun. I got into some stuff I probably shouldn't have. I started drinking and smoking a lot more then I had before. I think it's one of those things that everyone has to try at some point of their lifes but it wasnt the thing for me.

Soccer was the best ever. Meet some nre people had some fun for awhile. Now i'm just mad about it i cant play right now cuz i had surgery again. We arent winning but we are in a really good conference. Whatever i hope we have a good sumemr season adn a great USA CUP. Out team got so close over the summer nand then we all went to high school and some stuff changed. But we got together and it was jsut liek nothing has changed. I relaly love jillian most of all,. But i love everyone on our team we have been together forever but we really need a new coach. Frank jsut aint doing it no more. I'll miss him so much though but i think the time has come.

I really dont like South it's just not the place for me. I wanna go to Hopkins but i'm not sure if they will accpet me. i really hope it works out. All i know is that i am not going to south next year.

I have made a lot of new friends. most of them went to anwantin. I had a new boyfriend but we broke up cuz i didnt have time for one. He as so tight htough Alec Demgen was the name and i'm like really good friends with his older sister Julia. I love them. Umm yea and i meant this really tihgt kid Noah. I guess we have a thing, we do have a thing. I like all the peope taht i ahve met though. i havent reall chilled with that many marcy people but i guess we are still friends. I fixed things with Kayla which is good that was some dumb stuff that happened. Yea but Kayla and i are just like that honestly I will alwas love her, we jsut have our problems. yea i'm excited for this year it has started off really good i guess. I ahve made up with most of the peopel that i had issues with and things are good. i feel liek 2006 is gunna be a good year.

well peace out



current mood: sick

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Tuesday, December 20th, 2005
9:50 pm
I went to soccer It was great It felt so good to be with a good team But I did so bad I literally can't play whatever I'll get better I hope I'm waiting For a call but it's probably not about to happen I got a doctor's appointment tomorrow Another half day Yay, i guess Actually it just makes me really sad The endless fights haunt me in my sleep All i really want is you NO pop that's not diet NO candy Everything that I love is slippin' through my fingers yet again why am i fightin' to live when i'm just livin' to die

current mood: so many unanswered questions

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Sunday, November 27th, 2005
2:45 pm
Hey Hey Hey

I ahve not updated my livjournal in such a long time. It's jsut like i left sometihing here that i want to leave but whatever it's cool i ahve nothing better to do. So yea . . . this long week end as been great haven't really dont much of anything at all i was jsut like whatever time to each!!!!!! Chritmas is in 29 days and may i say that i am pumped i love christmas and i love snow and wow it's amazing. I'm so excited. This entry is really lame cuz i reallya hve nothing to say so yea i guess i jsut want to say hey hey hey. Peace out y'all i love you
<3 B

current mood: bouncy

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Friday, November 11th, 2005
11:06 pm - LAME!!!
This friday night was really lame and then i was talking to Alec on the telephone and he was like wanna chill. So he ended up coming over we watch "You Got Served". It was fun then we just chilled and talked. I <3 him! Anyways then I just got beck on the Computer because I have nothing better to do. i was botu to go to Alanye's but it ended at like 11 so there was really no point in being there for liek an hour says my mom well it would have been less than that cuz it wasnt till liek 10:19 that Alec left. Then I got onine and wasliek I'm going to update my livejournal and yea. I read the comment that Julia left me and she like flipped out on me for like no relay reason and i was liek okay. It was like wow you thin that I'm on Pete's nuts that much I mean I lvoe the kid but dang homie. Anywas I'm over this and I'm going on My Space so pace out.
Lil' Homes

current mood: confused, some people

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Tuesday, November 8th, 2005
8:11 pm
OH CUTE! There's a Marcy dance on Friday! Whose going with who? Whose dating? Leave me some comments cuz you knwo i want to hear about it you cuties!

current mood: content

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Sunday, November 6th, 2005
10:24 am - In Sirvoy's, it's a party!
I ahven't updated in like a year. I don't know not much has changed in my life. I hojnestly have had like one of the best weeks ever well, last week adn this week is starting off good, I guess. So the Varsity boys soccer got third in State. Then Wayzeta wont the whole thing. We got to miss two days of school because of that. Then our Biology projects were due and I got an A on that and then I passed my first biology test ever in my life. So that brought my wonderful F up to D. Heck i was happy with thyat. Then I got into Student Government. On friday chilled with Alec, taht was fun we are so weird we don't even act like cuple sometimes. Then I went shopping for shoes on Saturday with mi madre but didn't find anything. Sunday I want to the SOccer bankqut. Which was really long but I got MVP so i was happy. Jillian (jill) adn Akenna got MVP too of there teams which was really exciting. FIGHT THE POWER!THen this morning I walk into biology and find out that I actually have a C in that class! Gaby is now in that class adn she sits right next to me. The funnyt hing is that Palma Sits right infront of me and yea . . . Now i'm just chilling not really doing anythign so I thought that i would update even thoguh no body uses livejournal.Whatever well we have like 6 minutes till the bell rings so yea I'm out. Peace adn Love Always
Big B

current mood: this day couln't get any bette

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Saturday, October 15th, 2005
11:17 pm
"That's amazing, i'm not even mad."

" The small things in life are the best."

current mood: grateful

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10:20 am
The things one wish for never come true, unless your life is a fairytell.

current mood: curious

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Friday, October 14th, 2005
9:52 am - alec
hey whatsup im really bored tonight and im at home talking on the phone. with my boo alec. he's amazing. i love his eyes, they put in a trance. he is a bomb kisser too. he's so cute. im talking to him and he's singing hey mama. were going saidies shopping tomarrow. we are going to look so cute. i want to sex him up......but anyways, im failing biology and that sucks, but alec makes it all better.

current mood: cheerful

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Monday, October 10th, 2005
9:52 pm
I'm talking to Alec on the phone and kind of Julia. We hung out after school it was tight but he was sick. He's getting so mad right now. He's so cute. hehehe I feel like such a little girl right now. He makes me giggle, i love it!
byes Love Always Bianca

current mood: happy, smile

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Sunday, October 9th, 2005
6:57 pm - XANGA!
My XANGA is crazedsoccerchick!

current mood: creative

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3:24 pm - Life doesn't suck so bad . . .

So i just go back from seeing "Holes" it was good. Then after Alayne and I hung out with ryan and walked to aidan's house. Chilled there for a little bit then my mom picked us up, took Lane home and then I here now. I'm so hungry right now.

Anyways . . . so yea I have date to Sadies now so I'm really releved plus Alec is so tight so yea it's cool. well so I thought it was. I guess there's this chick named Jessica that is like in love with him. You know what that could mean DRAMA. So i guess like where ever I go drama goes with me but you know what I'm totally cool with that because I'm use to it. I really don't care anymore. Okay you don't always get what you want it's something we all have to live with it. If we got everything life really wouldn't be that interesting. I really want to go to a movie, i haven't went to a movie since this summer. </font>

School totally sucks I'm just like over it. I honestly don't really care that much anymore you know. Even though I still try my butt off to do everyhting good like Biology is just so hard and I'm like I'm sorry that I have you correct all my really bad work but you know i can't help it and i probably will end up taking it again sophmore year. I'm so hungry!

Well I'm gonna go and eat some food, then call Alec and watch some football.



current mood: giggly

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Saturday, October 8th, 2005
6:05 pm
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:Bianca
Birthday:Jan. 26th "91"
Birthplace:Somewhere over the rainbow
Current Location:Kitchen
Eye Color:Dark Brown
Hair Color:Dark Brown
Age:14
Right Handed or Left Handed:Right Handed
Your Heritage:?
The Shoes You Wore Today:White on White Forces
Your Weakness:sugar and when boys make me giggle
Your Fears:the dark, being alone,
Your Perfect Pizza:any pizza from Pizza Luce
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:Don't sweat things
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:OMG and idk
Thoughts First Waking Up:i feel great but, i gotta go to school
Your Best Physical Feature:I dunno
Your Bedtime:whenever
Your Most Missed Memory:Being young
Pepsi or Coke:Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King:MacDonalds
Single or Group Dates:Single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:Nestea
Chocolate or Vanilla:Vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee:Coffee
Do you Smoke:No
Do you Swear:yea
Do you Sing:yea
Do you Shower Daily:yea
Have you Been in Love:I thought
Do you want to go to College:Yea
Do you want to get Married:yea
Do you belive in yourself:no
Do you get Motion Sickness:sometimes
Do you think you are Attractive:my body yes but my face no
Are you a Health Freak:no
Do you get along with your Parents:most of the time
Do you like Thunderstorms:no, exspecially when I'm alone
Do you play an Instrument:yea,
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:yea
In the past month have you Smoked:no
In the past month have you been on Drugs:yea, but i had no choice
In the past month have you gone on a Date:no
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:yea
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:no
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:no
In the past month have you been on Stage:no
In the past month have you been Dumped:yea
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:yea
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:no
Ever been Drunk:yea
Ever been called a Tease:yea, once, Tyler
Ever been Beaten up:no
Ever Shoplifted:no
How do you want to Die:in my sleep, quickly
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:a mom
What country would you most like to Visit:Netherlands
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:blue
Favourite Hair Color:blond
Short or Long Hair:Long
Height:taller than 5'5"
Weight:i don't care
Best Clothing Style:Ghetto (i guess)
Number of Drugs I have taken:i don't even know
Number of CDs I own:over 150
Number of Piercings:10
Number of Tattoos:coming soon
Number of things in my Past I Regret:two

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

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3:47 pm - Suga, suga how you goet so fly
Okay I feel really bad about this whole week. I don't even know why. This is so stupid and I'm over this drama. I honestly don't know why wherever certain people go. I jsut don't get it. Anyways . . . Friday was fun! school was, well it was school. Then went to Alec's house with Victor, Dominic, and Marcus. That was cool, we were actually going to the game but we ended up chilling there for a really long time. Then we went to the game and chilled there for a little bit but then my mom came and picked me up then we went out to eat it was cool. we talked about a lot of stuff thne i just came home and talked ot Julien which was tight. Today just hung out really didnt do that much. But i gotta go do homework. But if your reading this and your bored totally hit me up cause I'm up for anything
Love Bianca


current mood: calm, it feels great

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Wednesday, October 5th, 2005
10:21 am

I'm at school need I say more!

I really do love him.

Cameron rocks!

If you fuck with me i will spit fire!

I hate HIGH SCHOOL!

My mom wants me to leave!

I don't know what i"m thinking of right now but all I know is that I feel like i'm going to throw up

I wish i didn't have a test in 4th hour so i could go to 1st lunch!



current mood: pissed off

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9:39 am - FUCK THAT TRICK!

KAYLA JOHNSON IS A FUCKING DEAD HOOKER! AKA WHOSE A BITCH? KAYLA!!!!!!!

DID YOU WITNESS THE SICKNESS THAT I SPITED AT THAT TRICK THIS MORNING HELL YEAH SHE'S LUCKY I DIDN'T HIT HER. SHE BETTER HOPE THAT I DON'T SEE HER CAUSE SHE'S GONNA BE A BITCH AND WAIT TILL I WALK AWAY TO CALL ME A FUCKING BITCH THEN I HEAR SHE SAID THAT AND WHEN I TRY TO FIND HER SHE ISN'T ANYWHETRE TO BE FOUND. FUCK THAT HOE. I DON'T EVEN GIVE A FUCK I FUCKING THOUGHT WE WERE ABOUT TO BE FRIENDS AND NOW THIS SHIT OH YOU DONT SAY FUCKED UP SHIT ABOUT AND GET AWAY WITH IT. THANKS TO HER MURPHJY'S MAD AT ME FOR NO REASON WELL IT'S A NOT TRUE REASON BUT I FUCKING PISSED AT HER NOW I KNOW THAT MURPHY AND I LIKE AREN'T EVEN GOING TO BE ABLE TO BE FRIENDS CUZ OF THIS SHIT AND THAT'S FUCKED UP BUT I KIND OF FUCKED UP TOO.

MURPHY IF YOU ARE READING THIS I'M SO SORRY. WHY WOULD I DO THAT WHEN YOU KNOW HOW I FELT ABOUT YOU. NOT EVEN FELT FEEL. I'M NOT ABOUT TO LIE SHIT MAN I FUCKED UP AND I'M SORRY AND FOR ONCE I ACTUALLY MEAN IT.

 



current mood: murphy i'm sorry

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Tuesday, September 27th, 2005
10:22 am - School and such+
I'm in my design class right now. Cameron adn I are working on a hairdryer project I honestly don't knwo why I still update this thing it's not liek anyone actually reads it eveyone is one like xanga and my space and scuh so yea. Schools been going cool except for the fact that i was hella sick for four days. haven't chilled with mUrphy in a while but hopefully will be changing that soon. Oh yea I asked him to Sadies and he said yes, for some reason i was so scared that he was going to say no i don't know why but I thought he was goign to say no, i was scared. You know what's werid liek I always feel so scared abotu those things with him and like he scaers me not in a bad way but uin a good way liek I want to please him so much that i wil liek go out of my ay you know. I don't knwo I really like him though a lot which is l;iek surprising and it has been forever and a year that we've been goping out. soccer been good I guess i ahven't went but I'm going to go today.I jsut want to get our warm ups thats why I'm going but it will probably be fun too. ui dont know. Okay Parker is like kind of close to me adn you knwo it's kind of weird like i feel some strange vibe but whatever casuse the bells about to ring. Off to spanish with more beautiful people. Love you all so much but most of all Murph durph

current mood: happy, everything is perfect

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Saturday, September 17th, 2005
4:54 pm - What's Your Fantasy?
[Ludacris]
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Give it to me now, give it to me now
Give it to me now, give it to me now

[Shawna]
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Give it to me now, give it to me now
Give it to me now..

[Chorus: Ludacris, then Shawna *2X*]
I wanna, li-li-li-lick you from yo' head to yo' toes
And I wanna, move from the bed down to the down to the to the flo'
Then I wanna, ahh ahh - you make it so good I don't wanna leave
But I gotta, kn-kn-kn-know what-what's your fan-ta-ta-sy

[Ludacris]
I wanna get you in the Georgia Dome on the fifty yard line
While the Dirty Birds kick for t'ree
And if you like in the club we can do it
In the DJ booth or in the back of the V.I.P.
Whipped cream with cherries and strawberries on top
Lick it don't stop, keep the door locked don't knock while the boat rock
We go-bots and robots so they gotta wait til the show stop
Or how 'bout on the beach with black sand
Lick up your thigh then call me the Pac Man
Table top or just give me a lap dance
The Rock to the Park to the Point to the Flatlands
That man Ludacris (woo) in the public bathroom
Or in back of a classroom
How ever you want it lover lover gonna tap that ass soon
See I cast 'em and I past 'em get a tight grip and I grasp 'em
I flash 'em and out last 'em
And if ain't good then I trash 'em while you stash 'em
I'll let 'em free
And the tell me what they fantasy
Like up on the roof roof tell yo boyfriend not to be mad at me

[Chorus]

[Ludacris]
I wanna get you in the bath tub
With the candle lit you give it up till they go out
Or we can do it on stage of the Ludacris concert
Cause you know I got sold out
Or red carpet dick could just roll out
Go 'head and scream you can't hold out
We can do it in the pouring rain
Runnin the train when it's hot or cold out
How 'bout in the library on top of books
But you can't be too loud
You wanna make a brother beg for it
Give me TLC 'cause you know I be too proud
We can do it in the white house
Tryna make them turn the lights out
Champaign with my campaign let me do the damn thing
What's my name, what's my name, what's my name a sauna, jacuzzi
In the back row at the movie
You can stratch my back and rule me
You can push me or just pull me
On hay in middle of the barn (woo) rose pedals on the silk sheets uh
Eating fresh fruits sweep yo woman right off her feet

[Chorus]

[Ludacris]
I wanna get you in the back seat windows up
That's the way you like to fuck, clogged up fog alert
Rip the pants and rip the shirt, ruff sex make it hurt
In the garden all in the dirt
Roll around Georgia Brown that's the way I like it twerk
Legs jerk, overworked, underpaid but don't be afraid
In the sun or up in the shade
On the top of my escalade
Maybe your girl and my friend can trade; tag team, off the ropes!
On the ocean or in the boat! Factories or on hundred spokes!
What about up in the candy sto' that chocolate chocolate make it melt
Whips and chains, handcuffs, smack a little booty up with my belt
Scream help play my game; dracula man I'll get my fangs
Horseback and I'll get my reigns, school teacher let me get my grades


[Chorus - repeat 4X]



current mood: bouncy, i'm so excidted, PARTY

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